Monday, August 30, 2010

The Funny Pages

Following a well-deserved rest from the tedious and incessant cyberloonybin world of RM, Chops has decided to lighten the mood from the dreary boot-sucking mud-mirings of the past few months. Below are a few priceless gems written by RM, from her plagiarized collection of cut & paste formerly known as Beyond The Third Eye. Let's review a portion of what RM calls The Universal Laws.

Rochelle Moore, on Albert Einsteins Theory of Relativity (page 24):

'When trying to understand the law of relativity, our first principle to understand is in reality nothing is good or bad, it's just the way it should be in a perfect state of grace. The law of relativity states, if we practice relating our situations to something worse off than ourselves, then we'll always be happy and fulfilled.

This law gives us the ability to stay  connected to our hearts when proceeding to solve the situations and basically translates to "Nothing is good or bad until it's related to something of meaning to you."

To simplify the Law of Relativity for mere mortals within this law we find, the deeper we dig, that everything is relative to something and if used correctly we win.'
 Rochelle Moore, on The Law of Correspondence (pg. 26):
The Law of Correspondence means that your outer world will be a direct mirror reflection of your inner world and that you are totally in charge; whether you wish to be a victim or ecstatically happy. The Law of Correspondence is a foundation principle of virtually all religions and schools of thought; nothing can happen to you unless it corresponds to something inside you.

An example of this is people who are constantly in bad health. Their attitudes reflect what is going on inside their being and are caused by them.
 Rochelle Moore, on The Law of Vibration (pg 25-27):

The Law of Vibration playes a very huge part in understanding Universal Consciousness. If everything is vibrational and communication is instant between everything, if everything is tied together within the unity of energy, then we are all tied into the cosmic universe.

This Universal Law brings balance, fulfillment and harmony into our lives and a life without the Law of Polarity denies us the ability to fully experience our physical lives.

If you are experiencing illness and disease you also have within that situation the potential and possibility to experience vibrant health by making the conscious choice to do so.

Rochelle Moore, on the Law of Cause and Effect (pg. 28):

The Law of Cause and Effect states that absolutely everything happens for a reason.

The Law is more commonly known as Karma (see Karma one of my first books on Amazon) works the same for everyone at all times.

Karma expands. Once we have an imprint of action in our minds, it tends to be habit-forming. Then it becomes normal. You reap whatever you sew.
Rochelle Moore, on the Law of Attraction (pg. 31):

The main principle of  the Law of Attraction is "you get what you believe in."
Rochelle Moore, on the Law of Compensation (pg. 33):
The Law of Compensation translates to: "You will be compensated for your work." What you put out you will get back in return. Eventually, with all the right effort you can have anything you want. 

Some people's lives are cut short though, either because they give up and quit or just simply lack the vision and motivation to continue.
The Law of Compensation states that for every loss there is a gain and for everything we gain there must be a loss.

How fun was that, kids? And you thought the Creationists were funny.

In honor of the above hilarious mishmash of irrationality, illogic and perfectly splendid misundertanding of poor Albert in particular, I give you Rochelle Moore in another incarnation as a very short Thithilian:

If leaving offerings to Rochelle, please insure that they are her two favorites: